Hey, friend -
I told my attorney I wanted things to be amicable.
Even over the phone, I could hear her lips part into a sad smile. "Yes. Of course you do."
(Narrator: It was not amicable.)
My divorce was approximately 157 years ago, but my body remembers what it felt like to be in court, confessing to the judge that my kids' dad and I had "irreconcilable differences," and weeping as my tormentor reached for me after the proceedings, apologizing through his own tears.
I thought I'd never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever get over the landslide of emotion I felt that day: failure, shame, disappointment, worry, anger, loss, confusion.
From that point forward, my kids' dad and I communicated almost exclusively via email. When I saw his name in my in-box, my belly tightened and my hands clenched.
His words were invariably cruel, and when my girls were small, I printed his messages and kept them in thick, three-ring binders. They were evidence.
Not long ago, I was reorganizing the basement and stumbled across the box of binders. As I flipped through the emails, it occurred to me: I remembered the feelings, but I'm no longer feeling the feelings. I've moved past what I thought would suffocate me.
(OK, maybe not entirely. I still have some sh*t to process. But still.)
So here's what I want to remind you of today...
Pep Talk #014: You won't always feel like this.
If you're lonely because a relationship ended, you'll be OK.
If you're discouraged because business isn't going well, you'll be OK.
If you're ashamed because of something you've done or said, you'll be OK.
If you're sick with worry because your kid's struggling, you'll be OK.
If you're frustrated because you feel stuck, you'll be OK.
I don't know how or when or what needs to happen for you to move beyond what you're feeling today, but you can. You will not always feel like this.
Wishing you well,
Kelley
P.S. I realize this isn't an especially business-y message (not that they ever are), but this is what the universe recommended I tell you today. ❤️
